Monday 24 November 2008
Idle's Do-it-Yourself Adage Kit
Using the following three photographs, competitors are invited to come up with an adage, phrase, or aphorism pertinent to the current economic climate. First Prize: a VAT holiday for two in 2015.
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If you are a Socialist and you find yourself in a hole, keep digging.
Preferably with someone else's shovel.
Better still, hire someone to do the digging.
At the taxpayers' (future) expense.
Brown: Oooh that Mr Greenspan, he gives me a wide-on.
Gordon "The big hole I've made in the island nations's defences will enable us to let in loads of spades, who as a result of the non-contrib welfare state will definitely vote for a couple of suet faced socialists like us."
Darling "youze a man wi' a plan, bro' put it there".
Gordon (unzips flies) [camera pans away.]
Does that work?
Excellent, excellent.
I might have been looking for something more pithy, a one-liner in the style of the great HL Mencken, for instance.
One of my HLM favourites, which seems to fit today's events:
"It is hard to believe that a man is telling the truth when you know that you would lie if you were in his place."
Gordon: ' ... and with spade production up for the forty fifth consecutive quarter, and the lemmings showing no sign of coming to their senses, I say to the house: "Our country" is on the edge. To stop the digging now would be to abandon all that we have fought for, all that we have dedicated our lives to achieving. We cannot stop now. We must go on, and then on again and again, and then again, until our work is done. This country can be buried, and it will be buried. It wants only the will and a visceral hatred of all that the English hold dear. I commend this plan to those few Scots here who give me my majority'
As for Mencken: In the context of The Tartan McReich's Führer and his McGlove-Puppet, perhaps 'It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man' is most appropriate?
Deuteronomy 23:13
"New American Standard Bible (©1995)
and you shall have a spade among your tools, and it shall be when you sit down outside, you shall dig with it and shall turn to cover up your excrement."
That was 'holy' wasn't it?
And finally, isn't there a blogger by the name of 'Brown Badger' somewhere out there?
And what ever happened to The Money Pit?
All these questions need to be asked, and frankly, I'm at a loss at the moment...
Gordon: That Stakanovitch bloke was some digger, what? Kept going, never stopped; my real hero.
Ali: I didn't know he was Australian.
o/t that's a fucking big hole.
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