Tuesday, 30 March 2010

The Glow of Success

How pessimistic must one be to roll out a tangerine-coloured multi-millionaire non-dom compulsive liar warmonger to increase one's vote?

And did you HEAR him? Decorum prevents me from posting the video. But he's learned a thing or two on his bible tours of the Deep South, that's for sure. HOOOOOOOOOOLY Mother of GAAAAAAAWWWWD, that's for sure.

I have never understood why retired politicians can 'clean up' on the public speaking circuit. Who pays a grand a plate for what they have to say? Do they give the same speech a hundred times, or a hundred different speeches which are, basically, the same old same old? I'm more interested in politics than anyone I know and I have NEVER been asked to pay for rubber chicken and a re-fried speech from Bill or Tony or the other plutocratic wordsmiths. I don't even know anyone who HAS. True, I'm going to listen to Lamont at a Reform thinktank dinner after Easter, but only because it's work and I know the wine will be excellent.

This tosser believes he is the Messiah. Let's take him at his word and crucify the bastard.


Scrobs... said...

I only ever go to events like that in the hope that I'll meet someone I don't know, and from whom I can elicit some business, hopefully mutually acceptable.

Speeches are always the big turn-off, especially from politicians who don't understand commercial diascussion, but Bliar has risen above all this, so the only people who ever turn up to listen to him are presumably more politicians.

I went to a breakfast recently, to join in some discussion with a load of lawyer's clients. It wasn't bad, and I achieved some useful leads, but none of these came from the parasites at SEEDA, Dartford Borough Council, Kent County Council, etc etc; oh no, they came from people who have to earn a living - and a pension.

Thud said...

Apparently he is going to save Brownie by captivating us once again with his boyish(long gone)charm...I can't wait to see.

rvi said...

A senior diplomat once told me that when folks like him end their tours of overseas duty one of their diplomatic colleagues always gives a farewell dinner. Speeches of course are made by the host and the guest of honour. The host invariably waffles on for 20 minutes saying how wonderful and productive it has been working with the GoH etc.

This diplomat said that in response to such cockwaffle his speech in reply was always as follows:

"There are 2 kinds of speech: a short speech and a long speech. The short speech is 'Thank you'. The long speech is 'Thank you very much' - and tonight please consider I have made the [long/short] speech".

He then sat down.

You can get to like such people!

Philipa said...

I can't even stand to look at him. Why they thought including this hateful warmonger would increase their vote I don't know. They must be running scared and desperate.

Electro-Kevin said...

Crucify the bastard. Ha ha.

I think you got to the nub of the issue without realising it, Idle.

He's booked because he can save his clients a fortune on expensive wine.

I think they should nail the tables down at the money lending conventions though - just in case.

Bill Quango MP said...

"It is easier for a camel to go..."

Except Blair has probably already done a deal with God. Probably already got an office picked out and an exciting new role.

"Ok. Just like in No10. You, Lord, do the details of prayer and, y'know, sin and stuff, and I'll package it all up into an acceptable sounding soundbite for the masses.I've been doing some figures and, you see, I think we could really clean up in the Islamic markets. At the moment you're not getting much penetration there. And let's not forget Asia. I've asked Alistair to bring in some graphs and pie charts for you to look at. And he's got some great ideas too. Thinking of taking out 'the Wrath' altogether. I know! I can see by your face you're impressed! But its all based on finding the appropriate...Erm, hold on Lord, let me just take this call...Hi, Tony here...

Elby the Beserk said...

Quite so. Pass the nails, and where's the hammer. We could do the incumbent at the same time, as well.

apricotfox said...

For goodness sake let's not treat him like the Messiah he thinks he is! Crucifixion is TOO GOOD for him ! I suggest a month on tour in the stocks followed by a crash course in bomb disposal and a tour of duty defusing roadside bombs without back up.

Philipa said...

Oh I am definitely with Foxy on this one. Good one, Foxy! Let's make sure he has standard issue equipment, huh?

idle said...

Agreed, foxy. Give him a pair of British Airways sponge ear defenders, a pair of slippers and a sharp stick. Then send him off to look for IEDs.

That should do us.

Electro-Kevin said...

No training, Foxy. Just deploy him with a manual based on a post grad thesis cut and pasted from the internet.

He won't need body armour either with skin as thick as that.

Savonarola said...

Sadly we got the PM we deserve.

The Celebrity Politician. The Day Time TV presenter. The You can Have it All Messiah.

We enjoyed being shagged by the Great Seducer. And we invited him back three times.

More fool us.

William Gruff said...

We preferred him to the alternative because that was the only alternative, apart from spoiling our ballot papers or not voting (usually mis-represented as 'apathy') most of us thought we had.

It seems to be a leap beyond the imagination of most voters to understand that we need to vote for those who will vote to destroy the party system.

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