Sunday, 19 September 2010

An Extract From the Book:

‘I had started jogging regularly out of Downing Street. Occasionally I happened to jog past a hooker standing on the same street corner. With some apprehension I would brace myself as I approached her for what was most certainly to follow.

"Fifty quid!" she would shout from the kerb.
"No way, 50p!" I fired back.

This ritual between myself and the hooker continued for days. I'd run by and she'd yell, "Fifty quid!" And I'd yell back "50p!"

One day however Cherie decided that she wanted to accompany me on my jog. As we jogged nearer the problematic street corner, I realised the "pro" would bark her £50 offer and Cherie would wonder what I'd really been doing on all my past outings. I realised I’d need to have a damn good explanation for my illustrious lawyer wife. As we jogged into the turn that would take them past the corner, I became even more apprehensive than usual. Sure enough, there was the hooker. I tried to avoid the prostitute's eyes as she watched the pair of us jog past.

Then, from the pavement, the hooker yelled:
"See what you get for 50p?"

23 comments:

lilith said...

That photograph is way too disturbing Idle :-)

Nick Drew said...

if you had told me that joke over lunch, Idle, you might have got an inadvertent double-helping of bangers

apricotfox said...

I'm with Lilith. Feel quite sick!

Call me Infidel said...

A touch of nausea here also. Though to be fair. Bliar makes me want to vomit even with his clothes on. As for his wife...well best not go there!

Scrobs... said...

I really cannot imagine why anyone wants to read this book, it was bad enough having to live through it all...

idle said...

I apologise for the lapse in taste, but in the interests of media freedom, the photo stays.

Scrobs, you do understand that this 'extract' from the book might not be bona fide, don't you?

Philipa said...

V.funny :-)

Excellent pic.

Blue Eyes said...

Great stuff!

The Lakelander said...

As someone who enjoys a nice tasteless picture - ten out of ten, Idle!

rvi said...

Idle, in case you are unaware of it, you may wish to note that this posting has gone viral. I had it yesterday verbatim in an email from a mate who resides a long way outside the UK. Needless to say it came without the customary hat tip.
Congratulations on your new found international audiences!

Dick the Prick said...

I love the 'W; branded on his arse but yeah, fortunately no breakfast issues.

circus monkey said...

The only difference between Blair and the slapper is: he managed to screw the whole country. Oh, and she probably doesn't have the blood of soldiers and civilians on her hands. Give me an honest who'er any day!

lilith said...

OT Elby wandered through the kitchen declaring "Chelsea is our bitch".

idle said...

Nice one, elby. A rare co-ordinated performance from your collection of UN millionaires. Perhaps Henry Mancini is finally getting a good tune out of them.

I have been invited by a client to the Bridge to watch Chelsea play Wolves next month. Feels just like the 70s again.

Scrobs... said...

You mean, this didn't really happen?

Oooohhh...

;0)

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Nikiqhvm said...

V.funny :-) Excellent pic.

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