Do you remember at school when there was 'time for one more photo' ("DO make an effort to be sensible")? Whereupon we all pulled faces, turned sideways, did the Eric Morecambe thing with one's specs, pretended to stick one's tongue in the ear of the chap standing next door.
This is evidently one of those moments. Why they have released it publicly beats me. Dave appears to be doing a braying donkey impression (possibly due to Gove doing something behind his back), much to the amusement of Hammond, Alexander, Paterson, Hague and May. IDS and Whassisname behind him have had itching powder down the shirt collar (an old, but always satisfying practical joke). Tom Strathclyde has had his hair stuck to the pillar and Ed Davey is struggling to contain his 'excitement', by the looks of things. Behind them all towers Sir George Young, who might be pogoing but, I gather, really is that tall.
A ship of fools if ever I saw one, with one clear and obvious exception: Her Majesty, calm, poised and ready for the shot. What a consummate pro she is, and doesn't she just show up the jobbing politicians? Quite how Warsi, Laws and Letwin talked their way into attending Cabinet, history does not relate. Let's just give thanks that Yeo isn't there.
PS See that carpet? It's called the Ardabil. I think there are four or five proper hand-tied copies in the world; the original is in the V&A museum and another got badly burned, I think. Commander Idle wisely bought one forty years ago and it lay on the floor of the big drawing room at Idle Manor until the house was sold. All that needs to happen now is for Idle or his even Idler Bro to buy a house with a 30' by 20' reception room. Don't hold your breath.
I know its her job but she does do it well as for the rest I wouldn't cross the road to meet a single one.
ReplyDeleteDid someone say "Ship of Fools"?
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Season greetings, Idle, to you, Lady Idle & the Idlettes. Hope to se you in the New Year. Move proceeding, but very slowly.
Elby & Lil,
ReplyDeleteI am in Zummerzet 24-26 Dec. I will need to walk my handsome dog, probably alone unless I can rustle you guys up. I will email.
My mum had to downsize to a place with a sitting room large enough to house grandmother's baby-grand piano. Sometimes these heirlooms outlive their value, IMHO. I hope your carpet has not.
ReplyDeleteDon't mention pianos BE. Ma Quango and lady Quango are determined to move an old heirloom into Quango Towers, against my strenuous objections.
ReplyDeleteWe already have BQ's Yamaha keyboard. Not some Comet tippy tappy beat box toy but a stage keyboard that cost a very young, new romantic, BQ £1,000+ back in the 80's. Its a model still used in recording studios today.
It has perfect tuning,even after 30 years. No notes stick. Or play flat.
Or dimp, or permanently sustain as will be the case with this ancient Quango piano.
The BQ Yamaha should be perfectly suitable for ms Quango to belt out come all ye faithful for many years.
However the Quango ladies have never liked the look of the oblong, black metal and plastic box. Nowhere to put picture frames or a vase of gardenias. And it only really matches with black ash bookcases and shelves from the early 90's.
They want it gone.
Before long I know I shall open the portcullis to two brown overalled gentlemen in flat caps, asking me to sign for a delivery and requiring 4 sugars a mug as "its damn thirsty work this business..Ooppps! Sorry about the bannister mate! That'll polish right out..Opps! .. Was that expensive? Sorry..again..Now, on three Barry..One ..two..Oopps! That might be an insurance job, that one..."
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ReplyDeleteThe Gas Man Cometh - Flanders and Swann
ReplyDelete'Twas on a Monday morning the gas man came to call.
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That really is a fabulous carpet. I am sure one of the Idlettes will marry a Duke and there'll be an opportunity to wedding present it off.
ReplyDeleteGreat photo of Queen :)
I took my poodle to a stately home in Northants (some cousins of Calfy)where there is a massive pink chinese silk carpet in the drawing room. She crapped right in the middle of it. Unfortunately it was the weekend and the lady of the house didn't have any staff on hand to tell her where they kept cleaning cloths etc. It really caused quite a flap.
ReplyDeleteLil, obviously ours is a wool copy rather than one of the 500-year old original pair. As such, it is quite robust and I think there is quite a lot of claret, fag ash and labrador puppy poo in the weft if you look closely.
ReplyDeleteOur carpet has loads of burn marks where the fire erupts on occasions.
ReplyDeleteScrobs has to leap to the spark in less than a second to extinguish the blaze and this explains why he was once such a good full-back, and also once, when a log had to be returned to the fire, a scrum-half.
I just felt that the vision you're now forming reminds you that behind this grey hair, lurks a sporting deity, ready to do anything to save the world...
I googled the carpet, and was much impressed! No cigar burns there, although the pattern may well have been inspired by same!
Idle,
ReplyDeleteExcellent. Our Xmas Day this year will be this Sunday, the 22nd, for reasons to complicated to detail. I gather we are having Lil's Mum over for Xmas Day (we are only just recovering from having her here for a week, post pacemaker fitting for her. She's very hard work indeed), but the 26th sounds good. 24th probably fine as well. Very good. Pig will indubitably try to shag Drummer, but that's the way he likes to live his life - being a Somerset Hillbilly Hound :-). It's nothing personal - just that Labs seem to do it for him...
Excellent, Elby. Boxing Day morning sounds the very thing. The Drummer is now a stud dog, having had a week's shagging in Gloucestershire at the beginning of the month; we are waiting to see if he is firing blanks or not.
ReplyDeleteGo Drummer!
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It's quite possible that it's not the only rug in the room.
ReplyDelete'pparently HM said "That was quick." and it had the whole room in stitches.
Her expression is one that says "What a bunch of arse-licks."
Not that I would imagine her thinking is such language but I'm sure that you know what I mean.
Happy Christmas to you and yours.
Kevin.
PS - I'm a fan of The Queen. I'm a convert. Whether intentionally or not she's kept her powder dry and I think her grandchildren have Royally stuffed the Blairites with their popularity and good looks.
ReplyDeleteIdle, Merry Christmas to you and the family and hopefuly a good new year for us both.
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