The Blair Ditch Project

Thanks to Boris, this bugger retires today.

"The Scotland Yard head told London mayor Boris Johnson he had never been distracted by any of the controversies surrounding him.

Sir Ian said he will be "fully exonerated" by an investigation into how contracts worth several million pounds were handed to a close friend."

Needless to say, this has cost us several hundred thousand pounds, what with his pension-pot top-ups and paying off his full contract. Why is it that a chief plod is offered such a bullet-proof contract? Don't tell me that you couldn't attract the right calibre without such a contract - it's the top job, for Christ's sake! This woeful excuse for a straight copper has behaved shamefully in his post, has been proved dishonest at worst or incompetent at best, yet walks away with all the wonga. Furthermore, he has presided over a Met where a chancer like Tarique Ghaffur can negotiate a million-pound settlement for a cooked-up racism case, instead of being reduced to the ranks and sent to Neasden to do some community policing, which is what should have happened to the lying swine.

And his parting shot - authorising a squad of 9 (nine!) anti-terrorism officers to the home of a front-bench MP, respected on both sides of the house, to do a lot of what's-all-this-ing in every drawer, cupboard, nook and cranny, when the MP in question has done no more than behave as all opposition members are expected to behave, and as all journalists do, be they good, bad, or Robert Peston.

And it is apparent that the Speaker, that illiterate numptie Gorbals Mick, approved the charade. He should be encouraged to visit his study in his plush quarters, with a deep fried mars bar and a revolver, and contemplate his position.

Irate Idle