Not a Morning Person

Volatility Explained

Since the start of 2008, the cumulative return to holding the S&P500 between 9.30am and 2pm been -54%. In contrast, the cumulative return to holding the S&P500 between 2pm and 4pm has been +35%.

This has been worked out by those charitable folk at Goldman Sachs. We must suppose, now that they have told us, that their prop desk has decided it no longer behaves like this.

But I believe that this is yet more evidence that a good City lunch, paid for by someone else's shareholders, benefits everyone.

Breath of Fresh Air, contd

Chapter two. In which our hero discusses the NHS and small government with a (admittedly) right wing news channel in America.

What I like about Hannan is his uncomplicated philosophy. He does not attempt to dress his views up in political terms, either to make them sound more centrist, or to help his own advancement. He is honest. I'm thinking of inviting him to become Patron of my nascent political movement, the No Nonsense Party.

Political Science

For those who do not read the estimable Croydonian, he has posted a GREAT LINK that many of you will enjoy. None more so, I suggest, than the Tuscan, for whom this kind of information provided the inspiration for his blog all those years and posts ago.

The number 1 global political totty is pictured above. A leftie, but full of Peruvian promise, it seemed. She beat Mara Carfagna, about whom the Tuscan has trumpeted, into second place. The Croydonian, his heartbeat quickening, rushed to Google images for more 'evidence' of Peruvian Luciana's pulchritude. He came away disappointed, as did I. Has the 20minutos voting got it right?

The way to solve this is for you to spend a bit of time scrolling down the list (waste no time on Ms Flint of Great Britain), and post your top ten, in order, in the comments. All in the name of political science, of course.

How numbers 32 and 43 got in, we'll never know; presumably to increase the number of random hits, as they are somewhat more famous than the real totty on view.

The best named, I need hardly suggest, is number 18.

Rat Jumps Into Sinking Ship

"An Essex Conservative council leader has quit his party and joined Labour.

Terry Hipsey blamed the Conservatives' taxation policies for his decision, as well as Prime Minister Gordon Brown's handling of the recession."

I beg your pardon? Surely shome mishtake. Full story here. Actually, it can't be the full story; something else has happened, I'll bet. Anyway, that's Terry Hipsey for you. Middle name Hoon, I think.

Dan Hannan Fillets McBust

Magnificent. Proud of my MEP. Good to see that the European Parliament allows uninterrupted ad hominem broadsides like this. A combination of a biased Speaker and orchestrated backbench shouting and yobbery makes this impossible in the Mother of Parliaments.

Gawd Bless 'er

Thank God for traditional British memorial art. They have made a good job of the new Queen Mum statue at Carlton House, standing beneath the old King. Simple, regal and profound. Sort of thing a chap likes to look at on his way to his club for lunch. I was so impressed, I took a snap for you.

A bit of an improvement on the GCSE Art failure of the Queen Elizabeth Gate at Hyde Park Corner:

Does that lion rampant have golden balls? Is it a lion at all? Looks more like a monkey climbing a tree. Not a bad unicorn, but it looks a bit hard-trained, more like a racing greyhound. As for the peacock and the floral tree, beats me. The tourist guides probably witter on about their significance as a metaphor of her life, etc, but it strikes me as a load of balls.

Change the Law and Let Patsy Hewitt Top Herself

The answer, since you asked, to yesterday's teaser was: Tessa Jowell and Patricia Hewitt.

Jowell, the oh-so-nice, oh-so-innocent friend of just about everyone in Westminster, is demonstrably idiotic. Whoever let her loose with the Olympic budget should have been weighed down with shot-putt balls and thrown into the synchronized swimming pool to drown. When she told us that the Olympics would cost less than £3bn, it was clear that she was A) stupid, or B) dishonest, neither of which recommended themselves as reasons to put this woman in charge of such a big and expensive operation. Where are we now on the budget - £13bn? Do I hear £14bn?

Patsy Hewitt, that supercilious blue-stocking who oozes sanctimony and cant in a way as yet unequalled by her NuLabour colleagues, managed to spend something approaching £15bn on the world's worst-ever computer implementation project. For her next trick, she managed to bugger up the careers of thousands of newly-qualified doctors, many of whom had to leave this country to work overseas, after the considerable expense of training them, which costs around £250,000 per quack, I gather. Even if she was telling me that I'd landed the Euromillions lottery, I'd still want to strangle her, so ghastly is That Voice.

And then today, she pops up from nowhere, supporting a change in the assisted suicide law. Fantastic! I'll drive you to Clifton Bridge myself and watch you jump.